Why do I have this very weird feeling in me? I find it so hard to explain. Is this some kind of insecurity or plain jealously? For a moment I was very touched when he asked me if I would like to join him for dinner with his team of ppl, its a kind of reassurance that I thought he was giving me. He gave me a choice if I wanted to go with him, if not he will choose not to go. I must say..I was indeed happy and relive but that feeling was shortlived. Cz as the conversation continued and I asked who was going, he mentioned her name on the maybe list. And then he said he will not go, he rather spend time alone with me. Should I be happy that he wanted to spend time alone with me or should I find this weird that he suddenly decided against going? Is it becz of her? That he doesnt want her to feel awkward with my pressence? If he had decided against going, then why bother to tell me and ask me in the first place? To set the records straight, Im not dying and insisting to join the dinner but isnt this whole thing just so weird? I tried to brush this whole thing aside cz I'm probably over sensitive. But on the way to lunch, I jokingly pop a question and his reply stunned me! He added by saying that he asked her if she was going and the reply she gave........haiz...what the hell does that mean?
Looking back, this whole picture paints the same when Alan was still ard. And when there were outings, I still insisted baby come along. I dunno right now if baby's decision for not going is becz he is concern abt how she would feel if she sees me or issit becz he just doesnt wanna go?? Arrghh..Why am I getting so troubled over this issue? Does loving someone very much constitude to such reaction? If so..then wouldnt love equates to pain? Baby's daily night out with his frens is also putting some stress on me but no matter how many times we talk abt this, we always ended up in quarrels & eventually he still gets his way. Im exhuasted with the frequent arguements becz at the end of the day, I know that no matter how unhappy I am, the outcome will still remain the same. If it makes him happy that way, I will oblige cz I know thats what love is all abt. Love is wanting and having ur other half to remain happy.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment